The good old days

Memories of high school (and junior high)...

What's worse than liking a girl who doesn't know you exist?

Liking a girl who does know you exist and thinks you're a geek.

I was in 8th grade, she was in 7th grade. She was a cheerleader, the friend of my cousin. And for some reason, she thought I was a geek. Don't know why - I was in the band, so that probably had something to do with it. She liked a football player, as most cheerleaders do. And I was always a "nice guy", which means that the cheerleaders and popular girls would never consider going out with me.

I remember being in agony when I finally realized I didn't have a chance. But, as in most similar cases, that agony was short lived - only a couple of days. So I went on with my life, which went rather well - stayed in the band, earning all-state honors; also in the chorus, but that's another story; in a couple of school plays; National Honor Society; salutatorian of my class; and I did meet one girl who thought it would be okay to date me...

Recently, I saw that particular cheerleader again. Turns out she has a child at the school where my wife teaches (cue the colorful dolls singing "It's a Small World"). She looks much the same, except for the addition of some extra weight. But then I look much the same, except for the loss of some hair. Didn't bother to try to talk to her - she wouldn't talk to me then, so why bother now?

But that encounter got me thinking about life over the last 22 years. I have a beautiful wife, a great son, a nice job, a good place to live, everything I need, plenty of what I want, and no football-related injuries (I did get a minor band-related injury, but again, another story).

So, as I realized after a couple of days back then, not dating her was wasn't the end of the world. Turns out everything worked out just fine.

Of course, seeing her again, it was hard to resist the urge to say, "Ha ha ha! See what all you missed out on!" But that wouldn't be very nice, would it?

Wrong number!

We moved to our current house over six years ago. Got our phone number right when we moved in. Six years is a pretty long time, right? Well, you would think so.

In the last six years, we have gotten more than a few calls asking for Brenda Williams. All kinds of calls from all kinds of people. My favorite was one asking if Ms. Williams was still looking to sell her property in Florida. Should have told them just to send me the check, and I would get a deed right out to them!

Yesterday morning, Labor Day, we were attempting to sleep late, which we don't often have the opportunity to do. And right at 8:00 AM (we were actually already awake) the phone rings. I answer it, wondering who would have the nerve to call at 8:00 on a holiday, unless something was terribly wrong with a family member. The caller says, "Is Brenda there?" Sounded like a sales call of some sort. I evidently don't always think quickly at 8:00 in the morning, especially on a holiday. So I couldn't think of a quick comeback. I just said, "No." And hung up.

So Brenda, if you are out there reading this, you have missed quite a bit over the last 6 years. And as the people who inherited your phone number when you moved/disappeared/were abducted by aliens, we are tired of getting your calls.

But hey, do you still have that property for sale in Florida?

God bless the insurance company

Don't you just love the way the healthcare system works? And by healthcare system, I mainly mean insurance companies?

A few weeks ago, my wife went to the doctor, who recommended she have an MRI. It was scheduled for the next day, which was a Friday. Actually Friday night. Not that it has any bearing on the story. So she went that Friday night and had the test.

On the following Tuesday, we got a cheery letter from our health insurance company proudly letting us know that the insurance company was going to cover their part of the cost for the MRI. Gee, that's nice to know - four days after she had the test!

What if the letter had said they weren't going to cover it? Could we go back to the hospital and ask them to take it back? I don't think so. Those insurance people - always watching out for you!

But wait, the story doesn't end there!

As a result of the test, my wife needed surgery, which was scheduled for last Monday. Just an outpatient procedure, although I guess it is always serious if it is being done to you. Wanting to get everything over with and the problem relieved, we were glad that they could get her in so quickly. Especially since another doctor that was recommended to us couldn't see her until sometime in September! So the surgery went well, although since it didn't start until 4:30 that afternoon, we were there at the surgery center until 10:30 at night. And then a 45 minute drive home after that! Good thing I had planned on staying home the next day.

So that was Monday. And then on Wednesday, we got another cheery letter from the insurance company, once again letting us know that her surgery was covered. So now we don't have to go back to the doctor to ask him to put her back like she was, since we couldn't afford to pay for the whole thing without insurance!

Maybe I should give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they would have called immediately to say that we shouldn't have the test or the surgery ahead of time if they wouldn't cover it. And to them, maybe sending the letter was just a nice way to let us know that it was covered, something to keep in our records. But it all seems a little strange to me. Not the way things work in the world that I would like to live in.

So now, she's fine. And - she's covered by insurance!

Life's a beach!

I love the beach! Unfortunately, the closest beach is around 450 miles away, so I don't get there all that often. And in fact it has been several years since we last visited the beach. Not counting our time on an island during our cruise of 2003, the last time we went to the beach was 1997. 9 years?!?! Time to do something about that!

So we did. Last week we spent several glorious days at the beach at Gulf Shores, AL. Just the two of us - no kids this time around. Beautiful white sand. Rolling waves crashing into the beach. Seashells, seaweed, fish swimming by. And of course airplanes constantly flying by pulling advertising banners (Tracks: Ride the Wild Woody!) We spent several hours out there each day, and then on a couple of nights we went back to walk along the beach around sunset.

I love to be at the beach, hearing the waves come in and out. Or riding the waves so much that at night you can feel yourself still going up and down, up and down. Or just watching the people go by. It was like heaven on earth.

One problem: the sun. Yes, I wanted it to be sunny and hot. And it was. But Monty of the Fair Skin evidently doesn't tan quite as easily as he once did, which never was quite that easily to begin with. And evidently all those claims of sunscreen makers of their product being waterproof after 8 hours doesn't quite hold up. I had on SPF 45, and still got quite a bit of sun on our first day. Which made the other days a bit tricky to enjoy myself and not turn the same color as Hardcastle and McCormick's Coyote sportscar.

We got a beach umbrella and some more sunscreen. And we both would apply sunscreen heavily each time we got out of the water. Problem solved, for the most part. Except that both of us were already pretty red. But that didn't slow us down or keep us from having a good time.

On a good note, three good-looking college girls in small bikinis (turns out there were several such girls at the beach) stopped to talk to me. Of course, it was mainly to comment on how my back looked sunburned and whether I might be sore the next morning. But hey, I'll take any attention I can get!

With how much fun we had, and how nice the area was, I don't think it will be all that long before we visit again!

Loud music

Okay, so the other day when I was talking about our subwoofer and sound system being loud enough to offend the neighbors, I was really just joking. Mainly because:

a. Our nearest neighbors are a good distance away (around 1000 feet)
b. I have actually turned a movie up to the volume that we normally hear it and then gone outside to see how loud it sounds, which wasn't as loud as I expected

So it really isn't that much of a problem. Not nearly as loud as our tractor or riding lawn mower. And we especially don't turn it up in the middle of the night!

Last night, we were awakened right around midnight. Which is remarkable in itself because we are usually just getting into bed around midnight. So we had actually gotten to bed early for a change.

We were awakened by what sounded like someone talking. We first looked around to make sure it wasn't anyone inside the house, which it wasn't - our son was soundly asleep. So next we went out on the front porch, and then we heard it. Loud rap music. And I mean LOUD RAP MUSIC. I could clearly understand the words, including several that I didn't want to understand. And it sounded like it was coming from the woods behind our house.

That was a problem because:

1. We own those woods
2. There shouldn't be anyone in there, considering we own them, and especially anyone playing loud music at midnight

So we put on our shoes and went out walking in the yard, to see if we could tell more about where the obnoxious sounds were coming from. And as we walked, we could tell that there wasn't someone in our woods (or at least if there were, that someone wasn't the one creating or generating the loud music), and the music was actually coming from farther on back, most likely from one of the houses on the other side of the woods.

That was a relief. Of sorts. We could still hear the music quite well, although if we went back inside and closed the door, we could almost not hear it any more. Almost. We thought about calling the authorities, but we decided against it, at least for now. Waiting to see if it was a one-time thing. Probably someone having a party of sorts. While Mom and Dad are away. If it continues, however, we might have to take some action.

And my first thought upon walking outside and hearing the music - "Those people need a decent subwoofer!"

Boom! Boom! Boom!

I like big bass!

No, not the fish, silly! Bass as in the ultra-low frequency tones that, if loud enough, can make you jump out of your seat and leave the room. Now as I'm typing this, I'm hearing someone who loves their bass way too much, because I can hear their car stereo thumping while I'm sitting inside my office. Nice beat they have, but I don't necessarily want to hear it right now. Reminds me of something Too Slim says in one of the Riders In the Sky CDs: These kids today - what do they know with their boom-de-boom-de-boom.

But yes, in the comfort of my home, or in a movie theater, or even in a concert, I like lots of bass. One of the nice things about living out on the ranch is that we don't have to worry about bothering the neighbors when we watch a big action movie with lots of explosives, or listen to Too Slim really get down on the upright string bass on the latest Riders CD (lots of free plugs for those guys today, apparently!)

So imagine my horror the other day when our subwoofer went out! All it would do was make a rather high-frequency (for a subwoofer) hum. No matter what was playing through the sound system. No matter if the rest of the sound system was even turned off or the subwoofer was disconnected. Or even if the subwoofer was turned off. As long as it was plugged in, it was humming. Being the electrical kind of guy that I am, I thought I would take it apart and see what the problem is. And it appeared to be the transformer inside, which is securely soldered to everything else, including the circuit board. So replacing it would probably require replacing everything else as well. Easier just to get a new one.

Fortunately, Mrs. B likes good bass just as much as I do, so she was equally distraught at our subwoofer's untimely demise. Watching TV or movies, or even listening to CDs just wasn't the same. Even shows like Monk, which you wouldn't think would have all that much bass. Still made a difference to us.

So we decided to celebrate our upcoming anniversary by giving each other a new subwoofer. I searched around, and found a good price on one that was slightly bigger (12" cone vs 10") and more powerful (150 watts vs 120 watts) than the old one. Ordered it through Amazon, got free Super Saver shipping! It arrived in about a week, which I thought was pretty good.

Now we are back in business! My first test of the new subwoofer was the new Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest soundtrack, which has quite a bit of low bass in it. Wow! Sounded great! Then I put in "Always Drink Upstream From the Herd" by Riders in the Sky. Once again, amazing! This subwoofer definitely passes the Baldwin test! And then we even watched the newest episode of Monk, and we could immediately tell that we once again had a subwoofer. Maybe over the weekend we will get to test it out with some action-packed explosion-filled DVD. The Patriot starring Mel Gibson is a good candidate for that.

So once again all is well at the Baldwin Home Theater. And the neighbors are once again glad that they are far, far away!

Wedding memories

Over the weekend, we went to the wedding of a couple of kids from church. "Kids" being used rather loosely here, depending on your definition. The bride and groom were 20 and 23. When we got married, the bride and groom were 20 and 22. We thought we were adults who knew everything, but looking back on it now, we really were just kids.

Our wedding, which was 13 years ago next month, was a pretty nice affair, from what I've seen in pictures. And there were quite a few people there, from what I have seen of the guest registry. My main memories of it were: Go here. Now go here. Meet Aunt Fannie and Uncle Frank. Be sure to smile for the pictures. Eat this piece of cake. More pictures. Smile. Smile! Oh yes, and happy wedding to you!

Yes, our wedding day was pretty much a blur. I don't have any bad memories of the day. But everything seems so rushed looking back on it all. I remember the sound system popping loudly. I remember seeing some old friends and meeting some new, distant in-laws for the first time. I vaguely remember playing the piano at the beggining of the wedding service. I remember the glee I felt when my new brother-in-law couldn't find our car to decorate with all sorts of crude stuff he had bought. He couldn't find it because it wasn't there. Only about 6 people there knew it was at my grandparents' house. We were wanting to get away quickly, and cleaning off (and out) our only means of transportation wasn't figured into our honeymoon plans.

The wedding this weekend was a grand affair. A church building packed full of people. Bridesmaids not wearing any shoes, which apparently is some kind of fashion statement. And an auditorium so dark that I almost needed a flashlight to read the program. Would it kill you to turn up the lights just a bit? The honeymoon comes later, people! The guy making the video is a good friend of mine, and he was saying the same thing. The video won't turn out great at all because of the light level. I'm sure the photographer was thinking the same thing.

The reception afterward was even more swanky. All kinds of food, hot and cold. Shrimp stuck with toothpicks to artificial trees. Didn't even get to see the cakes because of all the people there. Did I mention there were people everywhere? The couple, and their parents, are quite well-liked. Either that, or they were passing out $20 bills at the door, and I somehow missed mine!

I've been to several weddings over the years. I'm in charge of the sound system at our church, so that requires me to be there for most all the weddings at our building (fortunately, this one was elsewhere). And every time we go to a wedding, my wife and I turn to each other and say the same thing, "I'm glad this isn't ours!"

Yes, we are quite happy to have that over and done with. It was a great day, and one that we will always remember, even if those memories are mainly based on pictures. But we wouldn't do it again on a dare. If we knew then what we know now - that the wedding ceremony isn't anywhere near as important as the marriage itself - we would have eloped. Saving everyone much time and money. Not eating up everyone's entire day (the nerve of some people, having their wedding at 1:30 on a perfect summer afternoon!).

But then we wouldn't have the pictures. I mean memories.